Unexpected: Long-distance courtship

When I last shared from the Unexpected series a million years ago, my mom and I were on our way home from a trip to Nigeria in 2016 during which I had met Sayo for the first time. By the end of the trip, we’d decided to enter into a long-distance relationship. I wanted to keep things about Sayo quiet back home, even with my family, because I didn’t know if things would fizzle as quickly as they’d started.

After spending four blog posts outlining what happened in those first couple of weeks that we spent together, I’m going to cram most of our time apart into one blog post.

My mom was bursting to tell my dad, sister, and brother-in-law that I had met someone. She tried to get me to break the news with meaningful glances while we were updating them on the trip but I didn’t. Finally, she said something like Continue reading

Confession: fear drove me to Nigeria

A couple of people asked me why I went to Nigeria. Most of the time, I told them I was going to visit family (which was true), and sometimes I told them that I was going because my mom was going and I didn’t want her to go alone (also true). But what I didn’t talk about much is that I didn’t want my mom to go alone because I was afraid. I was afraid that she might become ill or come to harm, that I wouldn’t be there, and that I would forever feel guilty about that. My decision to join her on the trip was totally motivated by fear.

It started innocently enough: Continue reading

Facing fears and dealing with criticism

I can no longer say that I don’t have a boyfriend because I have the Nigerian Blog Awards! I’ve been staying up late with it, waking up early because of it, and buzzing with excitement over it. What else could it be but love? ;) The Awards have always been a labour of love and in addition to the evenings and weekends I spend on it, I take two to three days off from work to make sure nothing goes wrong when nomination and voting periods are launched. But that’s the easy part. The hard part is facing my fears and going bigger with the Awards—that and dealing with criticism. I live in fear most of the time: I worry about my parents’ health, about what the future holds. I’m a worrywart, even though it has never served me in a positive way. Christian or not, we know living in … Continue reading