Making friends through blogging


Blogging has many benefits: improved writing skills (practice makes better), free therapy or tough love (from reader comments), complimentary products (depending on your niche), and possibly a part-time or full-time salary. But the best part of blogging for me has been making friends through my blog.

One of the most memorable emails I received from a blog-reader-turned-friend was in August of 2008 from Seye Kuyinu, internet rockstar and published author. Oh my gosh, reading over his first email I remember how completely charmed I was (not that I told him that!) by his enthusiasm and passion for everything around him. I had been blogging for a long time but was new to the world of Nigerian bloggers and in those days blogging anonymously was the thing to do so I hid my name and other identifying details from him. Once I realized how cool he was, I stopped being anonymous, but by doing that, he unfortunately realized how uncool I was, through my whining about my insecurities. It was cool to meet him face-to-face in Nigeria in 2010 and I appreciate that he’s always there for me when I reach out.

Sharing details about your life on your blog lets readers connect with you and they’re waaaay more likely to reach out if they’ve read stuff that makes them think the two of you you have things in common. That’s what happened with Dee—she reached out and told me what any blogger would love to hear: she said she was a fan, she had read all of my blog posts, and she shared words of encouragement concerning my desire to marry. She also shared some details about herself and said that she’d like us to be friends which was so endearing! How could I not respond? I didn’t know what would happen from there, but we became fast friends, talking almost daily on Yahoo messenger (does anyone use that anymore?). We got to meet face-to-face in Nigeria about a year after we started talking and that cemented things. On my way home from my sister’s wedding in Nigeria two years ago, Dee was the main reason that I added England, where she had relocated to, to my itinerary. She cracks me up with her comments generally and with her FBI-like questioning style and though it’s a long-distance friendship I’m very thankful for it.

I was also fortunate to become fast friends with Detola of Super Working Mum fame. I can’t put into words how much time we’ve spent over the years discussing all things entrepreneurial and I sooo appreciate the emotional support and encouragement she’s given me over the years. It’s awesome to see her business grow (Christian moms, please do yourself favour and check out Super Working Mum Academy)—her site is friendly to all moms; you don’t have to work outside of the home to benefit from it. And I was so thrilled to meet her face-to-face a couple of years ago.

To keep this blog shortish, I’ll stop there, but since meeting the three people above in 2008-2009 I’ve had the honour of taking other friendships “beyond the blog” and I look forward to what the future will bring. Needless to say, I completely endorse taking blog acquaintances to the next level (when both parties want to, of course!). Even if the two of you don’t live in the same country or on the same continent, the internet that brought you together makes it easy to stay in touch. Unfortunately some blog-to-friend scenarios haven’t played out as I hoped but that’s part of a bigger lesson that I’ve been learning about friendships: circumstances and people change and not every friendship can survive these changes, feelings of betrayal, or other incidents. Sometimes I’m the bad friend in the scenario; other times someone gets to know me better and decides they preferred the parts of me they saw on my blog rather than the full package!

Have you made any good friends through blogging, either as a reader or as a blogger? Spill!

26 thoughts on “Making friends through blogging

  1. You’re absolutely and definitely right.
    Without blogging, I GUESS i would have my room full of unpublished stories and ideas without being known by the world LIKEWISE i would never have known some like-minded people, including you.

  2. Thats a really nice pic of you two. *i’m sure you know what my first thought was lol*

    I’ve got a few people that i’ve gotten close to through blogging and some that our friendship has extended past social media. I’d love to meet more bloggers in person. Seems like it would be fun, even if we didn’t become BFFs from it. We pour so much of ourselves into our blogs, it seems only natural that we should all be buddies irl as well

    • Thanks, Lady Ngo! Lol at your comment—he’s like a brother to me!

      What you said here is so true: “We pour so much of ourselves into our blogs, it seems only natural that we should all be buddies irl as well”. I hope you get to take more blog friendships offline!

  3. I’ve made some good friends through blogging – some closer than others. I remember meeting someone in a supermarket and we both screamed and hugged for 5 minutes straight while our significant others stared at us like, “Okay?” We’re still good friends a few years later and I like how non-judgmental we are of each other.

    • Thank God for the good friendships you’ve made, Nitty-gritty! You are a cool person I look forward to what the future will bring. What I like is that different friendships can bring different parts of our personality to light—the people we meet can develop us in ways we may not have thought!

  4. Hello GNG!
    Am a blog visitor but am in love with your posts already. Will visit here more often. My friend Emmy would love your blog. Keep writing.

  5. Although I was very wary of making blog friends that i have to meet face to face, I find that I connect with some bloggers\youtubers. If we’ve watched each other for years or months we might as well be buddies. A youtube friend sang to me on my birthday…her phone call was unexpected all the way from uk to 9ja. It gave me a warm fuzzy feeling inside :D…here’s to more blog friendships

    • Amen! That’s awesome that you’ve been able to make some great connections. Video (YouTube and Periscope especially) definitely enhances connections! I’m sure your personality draws a lot of people to you, Sisi Yemmie.

  6. Have had the opportunity to make a number of blog friendships both from being a blogger in a past life and a reader, three of whom I consider some of my closest friends at the moment. Good thing about that for me was that it made the connections I made intellectual ones first, and helped overcome any queasiness when we did meet in person, given a couple of the guys I became friends with were intensely private people as I am.. I do have people I would still like to meet… Fingers crossed :)

  7. I feel bad for myself reading this. I haven’t really made a close friend through blogging cos half of the time, they are always about ‘Send me your picture’
    I want someone to genuinely like me for who I am, not because they need a face to tag to my blog posts.

  8. Hmmm Jummy, I have met amazing Seye and inspiring Detola, but I agree with you with the benefits of blogging and making friends. I have had the privilege of meeting other amazing bloggers, some are more like family to me, and for that I am truly grateful.

    Longest time.

    • Hi Rita! It has been a long time—I hope all is well with you and your family. Thanks for stopping by.

      It warms my heart that you’ve had such positive experiences with blog friends!

  9. Blogging has given me so much, like you GNG! Lots of friends, a community, even opportunities to start writing, and publishing my work. I’ve become friends with so many bloggers and ex-bloggers, that sometimes it’s hard to remember that we first met online.

    • Hi Tolu! I love what you said about it being hard to remember that you met online—these friendships that form are so real that you don’t even think about how you met. I’m thrilled that your love of writing took you from blog to print and now publishing—I can’t wait to see what’s next!

  10. Hmm I haven’t developed any real life friendships through blogsville, but if I were to invest in one, it would be with you! You just seem so genuine and sweet. Being on WordPress makes it harder for me to track your posts though and stay connected, unlike when I was on blogspot.

    • Thanks so much for saying that, Neuyogi; it means a lot. I think you’re so cool, maybe too cool to be my friend—my insecurity would soon annoy you lol. I’m working on it though! It would be awesome to meet you one day.

  11. It is cool making friends through blogging., i cant realy count how many close friends i have from blogging, and they are all nice and helpful. And i belive you know how it feels to have great friends.. And am also meeting you today hoping to be friends also.

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